#matildamae

 

Dear little Miss Tilda,

I heard of you when your mummy was still expecting you. She had written of what your name was going to be and i remember smiling, we have a Tilda of our own and what a cheeky little girl she is.

Seeing the message pinged into the universe that your short life had come to an end was heart stopping. I think i might have re-composed my reply so many times, what can you say to a mother who has just told twitter that her baby did not wake.

You can say..nothing. Because there is simply nothing to say that can comfort such tragic loss.

But you are free in heaven little Matilda. Dancing and playing with those angels. Even though you are pain free and live in glory forever more. Your influence goes on here…people are walking, moving, marching with determination to discover what it is that makes little babies go to sleep forever in the beds.

Because of you Matilda, more people are aware. They know the sad truth and they are starting to ask why? Why are these babies dying and what can we do?

You, Matilda, are changing things. Your little life, your tiny baby sweet life, is changing our lives and the lives of others whose babies might be saved through the research that can take place now because of you.

Your legacy is this army of parents who will wade into the river of pain and stand shoulder to shoulder with those who are themselves in this dark place. Not just your mummy and daddy but those who come after you. Babies, like you, who are destined to be stars. We will stand with those left behind.

For you, little Matilda, its near your first anniversary, the day when you went into glory, the day you dance became forever. Hang on sweet girl, smile through the clouds and the raindrops. Slide the rainbows and plop your toes into the dancing streams. Sing with the wind and call out the names of your family in the thunder as it rages.

Dance little one, dance till your sweet family are with you again.

Someday.